


Take Me To Church

by to_love_a_lightwood



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Boys Kissing, Catholicism, Internalized Homophobia, Not quite child abuse, Religious Content, Semi-graphic, Sexual Content, Swearing, Violence, Virgin Alec Lightwood, hurt!Alec
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-07
Updated: 2017-11-07
Packaged: 2019-01-30 20:26:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12660807
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/to_love_a_lightwood/pseuds/to_love_a_lightwood
Summary: Alec hates going to church with his family. He hates getting up early, the clothes he has to wear, and the degrading sermons he is forced to listen to. Why does he suddenly find himself going every Sunday without his mother making him? Whatever the reason may be, it definitely has nothing to do with the extremely attractive singer.





	Take Me To Church

**Author's Note:**

> Hello readers! Sorry it's been a while since I've posted anything, but I'm pretty excited about this one! Inspired by the song "Take Me To Church" by Hozier. PLEASE HEED THE TAGS, it starts with some pretty heavy religious content and has some ideations Alec deals with. Everything has been taken from my own experiences, so sorry if it seems off! Enjoy!

    Alec hadn't wanted to spend his Wednesday morning sweating through his dress shirt and being choked by his tie, yet here he was. Crammed onto a rickety wooden bench, listening to a sermon and trying not to accidentally elbow Max or Izzy in the tight space. He had never really been fond of church, but his mother had forced them all to come today because it was Ash Wednesday. 

 

     Alec had been zoned out for most of the morning, staring half-asleep at the song book in front of him, when a smooth voice broke him out of his thoughts. "Please turn to song number thirty-five, "Emmanuel," song number thirty-five."

 

     Alec glanced up at the singer and was met with a pair of golden eyes staring right at him. The man up front was stunning, dressed in gray slacks and a dark blue dress shirt. He flashed Alec a quick wink before beginning to sing. 

 

     His voice flowed through the speakers on the walls and directly into Alec's stomach, creating a truly stupid flutter. He couldn't take his eyes off of the man as he swayed a bit to the music, his lips forming the words to the song. The light from the rising sun seeped in through the window behind him, casting a halo of light around his head. 

 

     Alec didn't realize he was blatantly staring until Izzy elbowed him in the side, shooting him a knowing smirk. He jumped, ignoring her look and rolling his eyes. "He's a good singer," he whispered, feeling his face heat up. 

 

     She grinned at him. "Sure, big brother. Whatever you say."

 

     Alec made it a point not to look at the singer for the rest of the service. It shouldn't have been as difficult as it was. 

 

********************************************

 

     Izzy hadn't talked to him about the singer since the comment she made in church, but that didn't stop Alec from thinking about him. He wasn't sure why the man wouldn't leave his mind. After all, he was obviously religious, which meant he couldn't be attracted to men. Not that Alec liked boys. 

 

     Still, when Easter Sunday came and his parents woke him up for mass, he didn't protest at all. He decided to wear his nicest dress shirt-a sky blue button up that brought out his eyes, according to Izzy-because it was a holiday and he needed to look presentable. If the shirt just happened to compliment his arms, it was purely coincidental. 

 

     Alec doesn't recall teaching his stomach acrobatics, but it seems to be doing backflips every minute he goes without seeing the singer. He tells himself that his eyes keep scanning the church to see if he knows anybody there. He knows Jace's girlfriend comes here sometimes, so he pretends he's looking for her. 

 

     Izzy digs her elbow into his side again. "Looking for someone?"

 

     Alec's not a good liar, so he feels proud when he has a story ready. "Yeah, Clary. I was wondering if she was here."

 

     He's utterly confused when Izzy laughs in his face. She's trying so hard not to be too loud that she can only point to the end of their bench, where Clary's family has been sitting for presumably some time considering their coats are off and they appear to be deep in conversation with the Lightwoods. Alec turns a deep red and tries his best to ignore Izzy's amused looks. 

 

     His heart stutters when he sees him walk in. He tries not to stare, but he has to at least admire his suit. It's a black suit with a soft yellow shirt underneath. Alec can't see his eyes yet, but he knows it'll match perfectly. He thinks it's ironic that they both picked their suits for the same reason. If, of course, the singer was into him. 

 

     He knows he's been staring too long when those golden eyes meet his. Alec allows himself to look for a brief moment, giving the singer a slight nod as a greeting. The eldest Lightwood absolutely did not get butterflies when the other man smiled back at him. 

 

     Alec can hardly pay attention, knowing that the singer was looking at him. He really tries to keep his head down and his mind focused, but every few minutes he looks up. Every single time, he's met with those golden eyes. 

 

     The mass seems to drag on forever, and on top of that when it finally ends Clary and Jace are still talking so Alec can't leave. He lost sight of the singer a moment ago, and he was simultaneously itching to go find him and desperate to get away from him. 

 

     "Biscuit!" Someone exclaimed, and it took Alec several seconds to realize that Clary was embracing the man Alec had been staring at. The singer pulled back from the hug, smiling affectionately. "How have you been?"

 

     Clary grinned, seemingly oblivious to the fact that Alec was about to pass out. "I'm good, Magnus, how are you?"

 

    The singer-Magnus, Alec thought to himself-was still smiling, although now he was looking at Alec's family. "I'm well. Aren't you going to introduce me to your friends?"

 

     Clary giggled as Jace gave an exaggerated bow. "Jace Lightwood. I'm Clary's better half."

 

     Alec's blood was rushing in his ears as Magnus brought Izzy's hand to his lips. What would he say to him? Should he compliment him? Try to ask him out?

 

     "-Magnus Bane," said the singer, extending his hand for Alec to shake.

 

     His entire body felt like a live wire when he touched the smooth skin of Magnus's hand. "Alec. Alec Lightwood. It's, uh- it's nice to meet you." 

 

     Magnus grinned at him. "Oh, darling, the pleasure is all mine."

 

     Alec couldn't help but grin back, even as a blush colored his cheeks. 

 

********************************************

 

     When Alec opened the new message on his phone, he nearly dropped it. 

 

Unknown number: Hey, it's Magnus. Clary gave me your number

 

     Heart beating wildly, Alec saved the number and texted back. 

A: Hi Magnus, how are you?

 

     The moment he hits send he regrets it. Really? He couldn't have tried to sound any cooler? Alec knows it's not too bad, but he panics about what he sent until his phone receives a reply. 

 

M: I'm well, darling. Are you coming to church this Sunday?

 

A: Will you be there?

 

M: Will you still go if I won't be there?

 

     Alec feels himself grinning. Magnus was flirting with him, and Alec was... Excited? Uncomfortable? Alec wasn't sure how he felt. He's pretty sure he feels something for him, but he doesn't want to think about what that means. 

 

     He didn't want to like Magnus. What would his parents think? If they knew he felt this way about men, they would probably kick him out. On the rare occasions throughout the year that Alec's mother actually drags them to church, he's heard what the people there think about homosexuality. He's seen his parents listen to the priest say that for a man to lie with another man is a sin, and he's watched them nod their heads in agreement when the priest calls gays "abominations." Just thinking about that description, knowing that it applies to him, makes his stomach twist painfully. 

 

     He wonders if Magnus feels the same way. If Magnus listens to the condemning words of the Bible. If he takes them to heart the way Alec does. 

 

     Alec stares at the last message Magnus sent him. "Will you still go if I won't be there?" He doesn't have to think long to realize he's known the answer since he first read the message. He replies to Magnus, feeling like he's sentencing himself to something terrible with a single word. 

A: No

 

     His heart leaps in his throat the second his phone buzzes with Magnus's answer.

 

M: I guess I'll have to be there then

 

     Alec grins. 

 

A: I'll see you there

 

M: Can't wait ;)

 

     He still has five days until he sees Magnus again. Alec doesn't think he's ever been this excited to go to church in his life, and it's all because of an attractive man. The irony isn't lost on him. 

 

********************************************

 

     The rest of the week drags on. Alec spends most of his time oscillating between thinking about Magnus and forcing himself not to. He tries to distract himself, but it never works for long. 

 

     When his alarm goes off at six thirty Sunday morning, Alec should be embarrassed because of how excited he is. He takes a quick shower and tries to tame his hair. It still looks messy, but in an almost-attractive way. Almost. He puts on a gray dress shirt and rolls up the sleeves a bit. He doesn't wear a tie, considering he feels like he's being strangled when he wears one, but he put on some nice black pants without any holes. Satisfied with his appearance, he sneaks out, careful not to wake anyone up. His mother isn't forcing them to go today, and Alec doesn't want to explain why he suddenly wants to go alone. 

 

     Magnus is wearing a deep red shirt with black pants and a black tie. His eyes scan the church, stopping on Alec. He looks him up and down appreciatively before giving him a quick smile. Alec is blushing, he can feel it, but he doesn't mind. He smiles back, not really caring if some people look at him funny. 

 

     He's enjoying listening to Magnus sing and watching him throughout the mass, but he really wants the priest to hurry up a bit. He wants to talk to Magnus. 

 

     Alec nearly trips on himself trying to get to Magnus after church, but seeing Magnus trying to hold in his laughter was worth whatever embarrassment he'd endured. "Hey," Alec says, a little breathlessly. "You... You look nice."

 

     Magnus smirks at him. "You don't look so bad yourself, Alexander." Alec knows his cheeks are tinged with pink, but it's not like he can stop the blush with willpower. He tries anyways. "I was wondering if you had any plans for breakfast?"

 

     Alec doesn't even think about his answer, doesn't even consider going back home before anyone wakes up so no one will know he was gone. "No, I'm not busy."

 

     Magnus beams. "Excellent. I know a place with a mean Belgian waffle."

 

********************************************

 

     When Alec finally wanders back home after taking Magnus to his own apartment, he's still thinking about breakfast with a dumb smile on his face. He and Magnus had talked for over an hour about everything from Magnus's cat to Alec's family. 

 

     "I noticed they weren't at church today," Magnus pointed out. 

 

     Alec nodded. "I guess they're religious, but only sometimes. My mom only goes to church for Christmas and the week of Easter. She only ever talks about the Bible and "God's Word" when she hears about abortion or gay people. It's like she's only Catholic when it suits her."

 

     Magnus nodded. "Yeah, my grandmother's the same way. I'm not even that religious myself. She made me sing at mass because she thought it would improve our family's image."

 

     "You live with your grandmother?" Alec asks in surprise before realizing how rude it was. "Sorry, uh, you don't have to answer that."

 

     Magnus brushes away his concerns. "It's fine, darling. I live with my grandmother because my mother died when I was young and my father was not exactly a good man."

 

     Alec feels miserable for bringing it up. "I'm sorry, Magnus."

 

     Magnus only shoots him a calming smile. "It's quite all right. How about this: you take me to dinner this Friday and we'll call it even."

 

     Alec's a little taken aback. After all, Magnus had just flat out asked Alec to buy him dinner. Still, Alec grins at him. "I'll pick you up at seven?"

 

     Judging by Magnus's smile, seven was perfect. 

 

****************************************

     Alec hadn't been able to stop thinking about him. He couldn't wait for Friday. He wondered what he should wear. Was it their first date on Friday, or had it been breakfast this morning? Were there specific... Guidelines or something that classified something as a date? What if Alec thought of this morning as a date and Magnus didn't? What if-

 

     "Where have you been?" His mother asks, yanking him from his thoughts so quickly he's momentarily disoriented. She's sitting next to Izzy at the kitchen table with the newspaper in hand, studying him. 

 

     Alec blinks, his mind trying to catch up with the situation. He fumbles for an excuse, trying to explain himself, but the only sound he's capable of making right now is, "Well, uh.. The- it, uh-"

 

     Izzy cut him off smoothly. "I asked him to return an overdue library book for me because I was too embarrassed to do it myself."

 

     Alec ran with the lie. "Yeah, I... I couldn't sleep this morning so I went in early."

 

     His mom is still staring at him, her eyes narrowed, but she nods. "Alright, Alec. Thank you for returning the book. And, Izzy," she says, rounding on his sister, "please try to keep track of the due dates. This is the third overdue book in two months."

 

     Alec excuses himself as fast as he can, but he doesn't get out before Izzy winks at him. He'll thank her later. 

 

     His plans to sit in his room alone are soon foiled by his sister, who sits next to him on his bed without being invited in. "So," Izzy sang, "how is Magnus?"

 

     Alec buries his face in his pillow, hoping that if he ignores her hard enough she'll go away. He feels a finger poke at his side. "I did just save your ass, you know. At the very least I should get an explanation."

 

     Alec gives up, rolling over on the mattress. "He took me to breakfast," he admits. "I'm taking him to dinner this Friday."

 

     Izzy's brown eyes are wide with excitement, but she manages to keep her voice down. "You have to let me pick your outfit. And while I do, you're going to give me details about breakfast."

 

********************************************

 

     Alec stands outside Magnus's apartment, running his hand through his product-covered hair nervously. He knows he's being dramatic-Izzy had only used a little bit of gel-but he guesses he looks okay. He was dressed in a denim button up, sleeves rolled up his forearms, and black skinny jeans. He had been terrified when he agreed to let Izzy pick his outfit for the date, but he actually liked it. As Izzy had put it, he "looked hot."

 

     It's two minutes to seven. He wants to knock, but he's so damn nervous he can't force his hand to do it. He's already been standing there for over a minute. He should just do it already. After all, Magnus was the one who had suggested they do this.

 

     Alec knocks on the door, a little too hard. He cringes a little as he realized how loud it probably sounded, but it's too late to fix anything now. Still, he criticizes himself until the door swings open and his train of thought immediately derails. 

 

     Magnus looks so different than usual that for a few moments all Alec can do is stare at him with his mouth hanging slightly open, a forgotten greeting on his lips. Magnus is wearing a fitted blue-green silk shirt with a pattern similar to a snake's skin printed on it. His jeans, which match his gray vest, did not leave much to the imagination, and Alec found himself tearing his eyes away with a deep blush. His nails matched his shirt, and the look was completed with eyeliner. Alec knew he was staring, but this was ridiculous. He'd thought Magnus was attractive before, but now he was absolutely gorgeous. 

 

     Magnus had been looking at Alec, too, but it had turned from checking him out to nervously gauging his reaction. He gave an uneasy laugh. "Alexander?"

 

     Alec realized how his staring must have come across. "Oh, s-sorry. I just... You look... beautiful. I just wasn't expecting it, that's all."

 

     Magnus smiled at him softly. "Thank you, darling. You look dashing yourself."

 

     Alec can feel his face turning pink, but he accepts the compliment. "Thanks. Uh-" he awkwardly offers Magnus his arm. "Shall we?"

 

     It's stupid and cliché, but it makes Magnus beam. "We shall," he drawls, taking Alec's arm. Alec is clumsy and he's not sure what angle he's supposed to have his arm at, but when Magnus gently moves his arm to where it's supposed to be and wraps his hand around Alec's bicep, Alec can hardly think about anything else. It's not awkward anymore, it's actually... nice. 

 

     Being with Magnus is nice. 

 

     Their date is even better than the last one. He learns a lot about Magnus, and he shares quite a bit about himself as well. He's never been this open with anyone. He doesn't really trust anyone besides his siblings, but it's easy to talk to Magnus. Alec normally hates talking about himself, but with Magnus listening intently and asking him questions he finds he doesn't mind. 

 

     He pays for their meal and walks Magnus home. While they're walking, in the middle of a story Magnus is telling, Alec feels a hand slip into his. Magnus's hand is warm, and when his fingers intertwine with Alec's it feels... Right. Their hands swing between them as they walk, Alec's heart racing because of the small contact. 

 

     They reach Magnus's apartment all too soon, and Alec feels his heart sink. He's having fun, and he isn't ready to go home yet. As if he can sense it, Magnus asks, "Would you like to come in?"

 

     Alec is nodding before he even thinks about it. "Yeah. That'd be nice."

 

     They end up on Magnus's couch watching some reality show that Alec had never seen before. Magnus was appalled at Alec's lack of TV knowledge and had vowed to "properly educate" him with Project Runway, The Real Housewives of Atlanta, and The Bachelor. Alec wasn't really paying attention to the TV. None of it made sense to him anyway. Instead, he kept glancing over at Magnus, who was utterly engrossed in the show. His eyes were so focused on the television, his lips quirked up a tiny bit on one side. He was sitting close to Alec, their shoulders almost touching, with his legs pulled up onto the couch. He looked beautiful like this, genuinely interested in-

 

     "Are you enjoying this, Alexander?"

 

     Alec jumps a little. "Uh- yeah, it's good." 

 

     Magnus looks at him with an amused expression. "I'm surprised you would know, considering you've been staring right at me for several minutes now." At Alec's deep blush, Magnus teasingly adds, "I know I'm beautiful, but the purpose of watching this was to teach you the ways of the modern world. Unless, of course, you'd like to do something else."

 

     Alec unconsciously licked his lips. "Like what?"

 

     And then Magnus was leaning forward, pressing his lips softly to Alec's. 

 

     Alec was stunned for a moment. He had never been kissed by anyone before, and he had no idea what to expect. Magnus's lips were soft and warm and not really moving against Alec's, but it was enough for Alec's heart to start beating like a rabbit's.

 

     Magnus pulls back, and Alec is suddenly extremely self-conscious. "Uh, th... That was my first kiss."

 

     Magnus looks so shocked that Alec wants to laugh. "Are you serious?" Alec's face is red from embarrassment as he nods. "Alexander, how in the world have you never kissed anyone before? You're literally the hottest guy I have ever seen, and I've seen a fair amount of them in my time."

 

     Alec didn't think any more blood could go to his face, but he's proven wrong. "Really?" He tries to laugh even though he feels so awkward he wants to disappear. "The hottest?"

 

     Magnus grins at him. "Definitely." Then he's kissing Alec again, but this time his lips are slightly parted. 

 

     Alec feels like his whole body is on fire as he opens his lips slightly to meet Magnus's. He closes them so he's encasing Magnus's bottom lip before they go back to the gentler kissing from a moment ago.  

 

     Alec gets lost in the sensation of Magnus's mouth on his, Magnus's hand smoothing down his side, Magnus's breath hitching with each caress of their tongues. He gets so consumed by Magnus that when he realizes what time it is, he leaps to his feet with a curse. "I'm sorry Magnus, I-" Alec runs a hand over his hair in an unsuccessful attempt to tame it. 

 

     Magnus only smiles at him as he stands and leads Alec to the door. "It's alright, darling, I understand. Text me when you can, okay?"

 

     Alec smiles back at him despite his momentary panic. "I- I will. Goodnight Magnus."

 

      "Goodnight, Alexander." Magnus leans up to leave a soft kiss on his lips before he closes the door. 

 

     Alec had a stupid grin on his face as he backed up toward the staircase, glancing at Magnus's door. He turned to step onto the stairs, only to feel himself falling quickly. A few confusing seconds of sharp pain on his elbows, knees, and a dull throbbing in his head later, he was dumbfounded at the entryway to Magnus's building. Did he really just fall down the stairs? His face flushed as he looked around, making sure nobody else saw his idiocy. 

 

     As he dusted himself off and began to walk home, he found himself pressing his thumb gently to his lips. If he concentrated, he could still feel the memory Magnus's kiss had left behind. He smiled softly to himself as he opened the door to his house and went to bed, feeling warmer and lighter than he ever had before. 

 

********************************************

 

     Another four months passed of wonderful dates and enticing make-out sessions. The two had finally made their relationship official, but only Magnus's friends, Jace, and Izzy knew. Alec hasn't been ready to go all the way yet, and Magnus has never once pressured him or made him feel like he should be doing more, but the two of them had experimented with some, as Izzy would probably call it, "heavy petting." Magnus had reassured him several times that the pace Alec was setting was just fine with him, and Alec was the happiest he had been in years. 

 

     If only Alec's parents hadn't found out about their son's relationship, maybe everything could have stayed that way. 

 

     Alec had been leaving to go to Magnus's apartment around seven. He had grabbed his keys from the bowl by the door and was about to slip outside when Maryse's voice from the kitchen table behind him stopped him in his tracks. "Where are you going this time?"

 

     Alec bit his lip in annoyance before turning to face his mother and father with an innocent expression. "Out with a friend," he said nonchalantly. "I'll be home in a few hours."

 

     Maryse's eyes narrowed. "What friend?"

 

     "Maia," Alec blurted the first name that came to mind. "You know, from my classes?"

 

     Robert spoke, his voice low. "Don't lie to us, son."

 

     Alec felt his throat start to close up. "What do you mean?" He tried to appear confused. 

 

     Robert slammed his fist onto the kitchen table. "Dammit, Alec!" He yelled. 

 

     Maryse put a hand on her husband's to calm him down. "We know you're lying, Alec," she stated. "You're seeing that boy from church, aren't you? The Bane boy." When Alec didn't answer, she continued. "You know, I saw you watching him from day one. I thought you had wanted to go to church after that to see him and I was going to confront you about it, but you stopped going so I figured that stage of yours was over."

 

     "Stage?" Alec echoed angrily, but Maryse ignored him. 

 

    "I didn't think much of you going out afterwards until a few weeks ago. You've been acting different, and I found cat hair on one of your shirts. That's when I realized who you had been spending all this time with."

 

     Alec was suddenly tired. He was tired of sneaking out and sick of lying constantly about Magnus. "You know what? Fine. You're right. I'm dating Magnus. We've been going out for over four months now, and I think I love him."

 

     Maryse shook her head, looking like the topic was exhausting. "Alec, stop this nonsense. You don't love him, you love the attention the perv is giving you. It'll pass in time, you just haven't met a girl that-"

 

     "Perv? Alec exclaimed angrily. "Don't talk about him like that! There is nothing wrong with him, and he is definitely not a phase-"

 

    Robert stood up, seething. "What are you doing this to us for? Is this a rebellion? A cry for help? Are you trying to ruin our reputation with this little act of yours?"

 

     "I'm not acting!" Alec was shouting now. "I'm gay!"

 

     Alec's head hit the doorframe and he was collapsing against the door before he even registered the fact that he'd been punched. The pain radiated from his cheekbone, barely giving him enough time to yell in surprise when the second hit collided with his rib cage. 

 

     "Enough, Robert!" Maryse yelled as Alec doubled over in pain. After taking a moment to collect himself, Alec fumbled with the door handle, desperate to get away from his parents. His father caught the door as he tried to close it behind him, shoving Alec as he left. 

 

     "Stay out, you faggot!" Robert called after him as he ran down the street towards Magnus's apartment. Hot tears stung his eyes as he escaped. Alec was heavy with guilt and pain and shame and what seemed like a thousand other complicated emotions swirling around in his head. He needed Magnus.  

 

He ran all the way to Magnus's door before stopping, hand already poised to knock. What if Magnus was busy? What if he didn't want to see Alec right now? What if he was so freaked out by what had happened with Alec's family that he didn't want to see him anymore?

 

Alec tried to shake those thoughts from his head. He knew he wasn't thinking clearly, but he was tired and upset and in pain. Steeling himself, he knocked softly on the door. 

 

Magnus was startled to see him, and his surprise turned to horror as he saw Alec's face. "Oh, Alexander," he whispered, ushering him inside and into his arms. Alec rested his head on his shoulder, no longer fighting the tears that wanted to fall. He let out an ugly sob into Magnus's neck, which made Magnus tighten his hold around him. 

 

Unfortunately, the movement put pressure on his tender ribs. Alec hissed in pain and pulled back. "Sorry, darling," Magnus said. "Go lay down on the couch. I'll be right in with some ice."

 

Alec was too tired to argue. He eased onto the couch to wait for Magnus. He only sat there for about a minute before Magnus returned with a bag of frozen vegetables and a first aid kit. "Where are you hurt?"

 

Alec avoided his eyes. "Just my face. A little on my ribs."

 

Magnus grabbed the hem of his shirt with a questioning look. "May I? I won't take it all the way off." Alec only nodded, feeling his face heat up a little. Magnus gently pulled up his shirt, biting his lip when he saw the purple bruise already beginning to form. He gingerly pressed the bag of ice to Alec's side, apologizing at his boyfriend's wince. He moved onto Alec's face, hesitantly asking, "What happened?"

 

Alec grimaced, more from the memory than the alcohol Magnus was applying to his cut-up cheek. "My mom.... She figured out what's going on. My dad didn't take it well."

 

Alec snuck a glance at Magnus's face, but immediately regretted it. The sadness and pity in his eyes was too much to take. "I'm sorry," Magnus told him again, but Alec shook his head. 

 

"It's not your fault. Thank you for helping me. I just... I didn't know where else to go, and I just ran here without thinking-"

 

Magnus shushed him with soft, short kiss. "My door is always open, Alexander." Alec felt his chest swell at that. His family might not want him, but it was nice knowing Magnus did. "Besides, it's about time we had a sleepover. I've wanted to braid your hair for the longest time."

 

Alec sputtered out a surprised laugh, not caring that it kind of hurt his side. "Come near me with a hairbrush, Bane, and you won't have hands to braid with."

 

****************************************

 

Alec stayed at Magnus's place for about a week before going home, and even then it was only to get a bag of clothes to bring back with him. He had been texting Jace and Izzy regularly and asking them to pass messages on to Max. He had even met them for lunch a few times, but he avoided all contact with his parents. He didn't feel like dealing with what happened any more than they probably did. 

 

Living with Magnus made him fall even harder for him, if that was possible. Alec knew he loved him before, even though they hadn't said it yet, but now it was so much harder to avoid. Waking up next to Magnus, late night talks, cooking for each other, and even simple things like coming home knowing he would be waiting for him made Alec's heart flutter stupidly in his chest. It was actually quite terrifying, to be so aware that one was falling in love. 

 

After two months of living at the loft, Alec decided to do something for his boyfriend. He knew he had a little while before he came home from class, so he looked up how to make a special dinner for two. 

 

An hour and a half later, the table was set with two bowls of pasta with grilled chicken and two glasses of wine (Alec wasn't quite twenty one, but it's not like Magnus would tell on him). He didn't want to be too cliché, so the only candles in sight were the ones in the middle of the table. The rest of the lights in the loft were dimmed, giving off the perfect mood lighting. The whole place radiated romance, and although Alec had never considered himself much of a romantic, he found it was actually really nice. He couldn't wait for Magnus to see it. 

 

Alec was just pulling on a dark gray button-up over his black jeans when he heard the front door open. He quickly ran his hand through his hair and gave himself a once-over before going to see his boyfriend. 

 

Magnus was standing in the doorway with a shocked expression on his face as he took in the loft. From the romantic lighting to the perfectly set table, everything looked incredible. When he finally noticed Alec, it looked like he was about to cry. "What's this for?"

 

Alec shrugged, casually walking towards his boyfriend. "For you," he said simply. 

 

Alec had been planning to tell Magnus everything. He wanted to tell him how much it meant to him that Magnus took him in. He needed him to know how grateful he was for turning him from a closeted, grumpy ball of oppression into the relaxed, happy man he was now. He had to thank him for it, for everything, but before he could open his mouth Magnus was kissing him with such ferocity and so much passion that he stumbled back a bit. 

 

When he recovered from the initail surprise, he kissed him back just as hard, and before he knew it their tongues were battling for dominance and Alec's head was spinning. Soon, he pulled back for air, placing a hand on Magnus's chest in an attempt to restrain him from going back in for another kiss. "As much as I would love to make out with you right now, I don't want dinner to get cold."

 

Magnus smiled up at him. "Let me go put my bag down and I'll join you."

 

Thirty minutes later, the wine had left Alec feeling warm and happy. He and Magnus had been talking about anything and everything, from school to Project Runway. After they were finished, Magnus drained what was left of his wine. "Alexander, this was the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me." 

 

Alec fought his blush. "You deserve it more than anyone. I... I've been wanting to do this for a while, actually. To thank you for... well, everything."

 

Magnus's eyes were shining, but he didn't answer. Instead, he leaned across the table and captured Alec's lips in a soft kiss. There was so much emotion behind it that Alec nearly whimpered as Magnus slid his tongue along his bottom lip. Alec granted him entrance, and he felt his legs grow weaker with each brush of their mouths. He felt himself getting light-headed, drunk on the wine and Magnus's lips. He pulled back just long enough to breathlessly whisper, "Bedroom?"

 

In lieu of words, they stood up and Magnus walked him backwards into their bed, only breaking apart to shed the occasional article of clothing. In minutes Magnus was pressing him into the mattress, each of them clad in nothing but their boxers. Magnus was grinding his hips down to search for friction, but Alec pulled back before he could get too excited. "I want you," he said quietly, yet so steadily he surprised himself. "I'm ready."

 

Magnus looked surprised. "Are you sure? We can stay like this if it's what you want." 

 

Alec grabbed Magnus's hand, trying to convey his sincerity. "I'm sure. I want this. Please."

 

Magnus's eyes softened as he kissed Alec again. "Okay." 

 

Alec felt his heart kick into overdrive as Magnus began to kiss down his neck, following the trail of his abs down to his boxers. He lost track of time, drowning in the sensation of he and Magnus finally becoming one. Magnus's teeth were nipping at his neck, Alec's hands running up his boyfriend's arms and across his chest before ending up in his hair. It felt like hours later when a final stutter of their hips ended Alec's ability to think. He was gone, saying Magnus's name until it ceased to make sense. 

 

When he came down, he opened his eyes to look at Magnus. He looked tired, but so happy it made Alec's chest hurt. "I love you, Magnus," Alec said. 

 

Magnus's eyes grew wide, but he smiled after only a moment of shock. "I love you too, Alexander."

 

Magnus snuggled up to Alec's chest, settling in for the night. He fell asleep quickly, but Alec couldn't stop thinking. Six months ago, he never would have even thought about doing what he'd done tonight. The very thought probably would have made him sick to his stomach with shame. Six months ago, he would have felt crushed by the wrongness of the situation, convinced that his parents would find out and tell him what a disgusting abomination he was. He would have been so worried, so scared of judgement that he never would have tried to do what he and Magnus just did. 

 

Now, he didn't feel any of that. He felt lighter than he'd ever been before. Tonight, he was going to fall asleep next to his boyfriend whom he loved more than anything, and who loved him back just as much. Alec knew his life wasn't perfect, but with Magnus by his side, he wouldn't ask for anything else. Alec couldn't help but feel that Magnus was his second chance at Heaven, and he would be damned if he ever let him go.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you all enjoyed this! Don't forget, comments and kudos only take a few seconds and make an author's day! :)


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